Thursday, December 10, 2009
(not quite) Mass Mayhem
I'm still slogging away at the cleaning, though slowly... I did some of the bathroom done today... it's all scritched out over there on the left... but I think that list will change in the next day or so because Adam and I have declared this weekend "Get It All Done Or Else".
Also known as "The Kids Are Now On Holidays And It's Impossible To Clean With Them At Home All Day Every Day For Six Whole Weeks"
I'm hoping that this little bog o' mine will get more exciting later on... It's been so long since I've kept something like this that I've almost forgotten how to do it. I know I used to attempt deepness and humour... often simultaneously... over on my Xanga... but Xanga is now no longer what it was, and while that makes me sad, I'm hoping this here will become a new place for me to unwravel what's going on in my head, heart and home.
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
Because I Like Nothing Better Than Deadlines, and the Whooshing Noise They Make as They Go Past.

Friday, December 4, 2009
Yes, Well...
A) They will get spread all over the floor, trodden on and have to be washed again without being worn
or
B) The cat will pee on there somewhere, and it'll all have to be washed again without being worn.
However, I have done enough that Adam and I should be able to pull an all nighter, or at least a late one, and have it done this evening.
But I am emotionally exhausted.
November has been CRAZY financially. We had three cars break down. We had registration due... School bond to pay... money lost... money tied up... the girls ballet production costume hire... food (our one shocking habit)... the fridge needed new seals... the utilities bill is due any day now... and so on and so forth.
I am convinced God will provide. This does not mean however, that the month has not worn me down. It also doesn't mean I didn't totally flip out at the customer service chick on the other end of the line today, when I rang in a panic because my card wouldn't work at the ATM.
"It looks as if your card is damaged. I will send you a new one, but it will take 7-14 days. I hope you didn't need any money."
You know the proverbial last straw? That was it. I crumbled. I completely lost it. Saying such helpful things like "what a stupid thing to say! Why else would I go to an ATM if I didn't need money?!"
I am all forgiveness and light, obviously. And also obviously, my normal, laid back, low blood pressure character was temporarily hijacked by some neurotic psycho with no self control and blood pressure through the roof.
I rang The Hubsand in tears. I never cry over money. Well, hardly ever. Not for a long time, anyway. We have, as I mentioned the other day, guests coming for dinner on Christmas day, and I haven't even started shopping for food, or even ordered the meat. I just didn't see how we could make it work.
Today I will go up to where the kids Christmas toys are on layaway and will cancel it to get the money we have paid on it back. And we will start again, only with less stuff. We will look at getting some of the bigger, more special stuff we had (the Wii etc) in the January sales.
And we will continue to believe that God is in control. We will continue to trust in Him. Sure, I've failed in the "be joyful in ALL things". But I know I've never questioned that He will come through. I might not know how exactly, He plans on doing that, but really, is that for me to know prior to it happening?
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
Christmas Cleaning
I should be putting up my Christmas decorations, but my house isn't clean enough. I cannot fathom fluffing the house for the festive season unless it's pristine.
I have 1 husband, 5 children, a cat and a dog. My house is never pristine. But, as I suffer from MagazineCover-itis in it's most chronic form, I still expect it to be.
As you can probably gather, my expectations are rarely met.
However, as I am having a house full of guests over for Christmas dinner this year... a total of 7 adults and as many children in this tiny little house... I feel the need to have it sparkling.
Of course, I want it to be perfect for my family as well, during the rest of the year, but I find the task so overwhelmingly insurmountable most days, it... isn't. It's something I've been working on for many years, and I think I'm beginning to see the light at the end of the tunnel. For the last month I've been tossing umpteen garbage bags a week of miscellaneous crap to the op-shop... which in itself is wonderfully therapeutic... not actually having that stuff in the house to clean up or find a home for any more. But I'm still not noticing the house getting any cleaner.
And I'm pretty sure I've figured out why.
I stopped writing myself lists. A plan of attack for the day. Something to keep me on track. Without lists, I could waste my whole day looking for the perfect Christmas tags on Etsy (which I may or may not have done yesterday).
So, I'm beginning again. Only this time, I'm going to add it to my left side bar, so you can see it, and it should keep me accountable. I'm going to give myself until Friday night to have it done. That's two and a half days. I shall have Pride and Prejudice on in the background... I find it the most wonderful thing to clean to.
If you are feeling the urge to deep clean your house, feel free to join me.
Thursday, November 19, 2009
Home is Heaven
In a nutshell, she was wondering why we were being exhorted in Crazy Love, and in other studies she is currently doing to keep our focus on Heaven and be obsessed with it. It made her feel a little uncomfortable that so much focus was on Heaven, and not on works down here.
An excerpt of her discussion
"I don’t see myself preparing for a final day. Instead it’s about living here and now, working for heaven here on earth. Yes, I look forward to seeing Jesus in heaven but while I’m waiting, there are things I can be doing to work towards heaven on earth. As in: “Thy Kingdom come, thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven...
I’ve been studying about the prophets and their prophecies about the coming of Christ and what the Gospels write about those prophecies. The first century Israelites (and their forefathers) were longing for a king to change the world. Prophets who wrote about a coming savior were passing on a message from God. The prophets were responding to the yearning of the people for a hope; for a new kind of kingdom with a ruler that brought peace and justice to the world. Jesus was and is that savior. But I see him as coming to change this world not heaven. It makes me uncomfortable to have so much focus be on heaven.”
I thought I might post my own comment back to her here, and see what you all think? What are your views on Heaven?
Good thought provoking question!
I think, that earth is not our Home. We *should* want to go Home. The sole aim and purpose of Jesus coming was to reconcile us to God, so that we can spend eternity with Him. If Christ hadn't come, we'd be doomed to hell, and life here on earth would be pointless.
Hebrews 11:1 tells us "Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see." We hope for heaven :) We are certain of the existence of God and His Kingdom. Verses 14-16 of Hebrew say "People who say such things show that they are looking for a country of their own. If they had been thinking of the country they had left, they would have had opportunity to return. Instead, they were longing for a better country—a heavenly one. Therefore God is not ashamed to be called their God, for he has prepared a city for them."
If all we did was only for this world, the one that will surely pass away, (Matthew 24:35) then I would think that God made an error. Since we know He cannot, we must presume that there is a reward waiting for us in heaven for all we do. (Matthew 5:12, Luke 6:23)
We are here to influence as many people for the Kingdom as we possibly can. God wants everyone there! Jesus taught A LOT about Heaven; what was in store for us there, who could and couldn't go, what would and wouldn't get you there. The goal of our lives is Heaven. It's our reward. It's to spend all of eternity loving on God, praising and worshiping him... basking in His presence. We are also told, that what we do here on earth will count to what we get in Heaven. So it all works together beautifully :)
We're running a race. We're told to do it faithfully, with all our strength and "for the prize" (1 Corinthians 9:24, Philippians 3:14)
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
Tis the Season...

Saturday, November 7, 2009
Thanks and a Reward... kind of.
I sort of have a reward for you.
It's completely selfish though, because I hope it helps me. ;)
Centsational Girl has one of the most awesome DIY blogs out there in cyberspace. I el-oh-vee-ee it. And guess what?! She's giving away...
....
A ONE HUNDRED DOLLAR gift voucher to Lisa Leonard!
SQUEE!!
I adore Lisa's designs. I've wanted one for ages. Particularly the "Fly Free" one... when I first saw it, I caught my breath... it works beautifully for a prophesy I was given once. It would be such a sweet reminder.
But I think, if I win, I'll use the voucher for something for my mother... I've been trying to work out a way to get her 4 kids, 2 sons in law and nearly 8 grandchildren onto one pendant. So I emailed Lisa to ask a question... and she wrote back the sweetest email :) She assured me it wasn't a dumb question, but unfortunately, what I had asked for wasn't possible after all. But she did give me some lovely ideas to use instead. I'm thinking she needs to come up with a "Grandmother" range.
What do you think?
So, anyway... this is just ONE of my entries :)
That's right, Centsational Girl is giving you FOUR chances of wining this awesome prize.
..............
Why are you still here?!
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
Crazy Love Chapter 8: Profiles of the Obsessed
Please know I use the term "blogger" very loosely.
How's everyone doing so far with the book? I'm loving it, but at the same time, I explain it to those I'm talking to that it's an uncomfortable read. It certainly isn't the type of book I would turn to if I was going for a bubble bath and wanted to switch of and not think. It was the type of book that I shoved into the hands of my pastor and said "You need to read this!"
Then realised what I said and had to back pedal.
Love you honey (I found this here after I quickly ducked out of the room. I'm totally leaving it in.)
*happy sigh* He's a sweetie.
I promise I'm going to try very hard not to use any Aussie-isms in this post... but please forgive me if a few slip in there :)
But let's get into the juicy, shall we? And it is a meaty chapter, for me at least. "They've given me the hardest one," I whined to Adam. "He's already explained pretty much everything... what can I add to it? How do I discuss something that is already out there so simply?"
So I started and then got stuck. And got all stressed out. So I jumped on Bloom Chat and picked the minds of The Night Crew without them really being aware. So girls, if you see things you've said here, this is your credit ;) And I heart you.
I'm going to start by saying that there was no way I was going to be able to cover everything contained in this chapter. So, if I have missed a segment you particularly wanted to be discussed, please hop on over to the Ning site and start a discussion in the forums. Don't be shy or embarrassed! We'd love to hear what you have to say and we honestly look forward to talking with you. I am in no way a bible scholar, and most of the women over there aren't either. All of the women I have encountered over there are lovely and approachable and have a wealth of wisdom and insight. And don't be intimidated by the chat! It goes pretty fast, but you'll get used to it. :) Just jump in and say hi. It's not intimidating. We talk about food and messy houses, hopes, fears and boobs. Seriously. We are so normal.
And, quite obviously, super spiritual.
So... grab your coffee, tea or wine any other caffeinated beverage of choice, because you'll need it. I've waffled rather. It's what happens when there is no word limit. I'm at home with kids all day. I need to use up my quota of adult words.
What I think is the crux of the chapter is that the obsessed are givers. Givers of love, lives, time and resources. They give joyfully, unreservedly and often unrequitedly. Those who are obsessed are willing to do whatever He asks, whenever He asks. I don't think this chapter was written to make you feel like you should be doing doing doing, and if you aren't then you FAIL, or you don't love Jesus. I admit I felt that way at first. But what I think what we need to ask ourselves is "are we surrendered to God?" Are we prepared to say "Speak, Lord, Your servant is listening."? (1 Samuel 3:10)
Profile of the Obsessed
Francis gave us the definition of Obsessed right at the beginning...
"To have the mind excessively occupied with a single emotion or topic." (Emphasis mine)
Welcome to conviction, Jen. I hope you enjoy your stay.
It's going to be a long chapter. I can tell.
I'll say it right now... I'm not obsessed with Jesus. Not even nearly. But I'd dearly, dearly love to be.
I don't know about you, but there are a million other things that take up my thoughts pretty much most of the time. My thoughts are not obsessively focused on Christ and His Word. Most of the time I'm focused on how many loads of laundry it will take to make it look like I've done something significant today, or where in the world Bethany has lost her glasses again, or what I'm going to cook for dinner or or or...
So let's look at the profiles of the Obsessed.
Obsessive Givers of Love
We all know the golden rule. It's been around since... forever.
When reading that passage from Luke 6, I thought I would research verse 35 a little bit. I looked up what words for, "love" "enemy" and "hate" were used. I asked the questions of whether enemy was for a non believer or a brother or sister "in" Christ who was just a big meanie. Did we just have to be friendly, or show unconditional love?
I'll be honest and own up that I was looking for a cop out.
I didn't get it.
The word for love used is agape. Agape was a word that was created especially to define the love Christians had for each other as opposed to the others; eros (passionate), philia(friendship) and storge (parental/family relational). Agape pretty much means that no matter what the person does to us, we won't let ourselves want anything other than the highest good for them, and that we will go out of our way to be good and kind to them. It's also noted in this instance of implying a perpetual abiding rule of action. Not just forcing a smile whenever we happen to run into them up at Target. All. The. Time. For realz NICE.
The word for enemy, echthros, is a personal one, not, say, a governmental one. The definition of a personal enemy is, basically, anyone who wishes you harm, or opposes your interests, or feels hatred towards you.
The word used for hate is miseo. It means to pursue with hatred or detest. The person who miseo's you makes it pretty well known. They do it doggedly.
I don't know about you, but I personally don't have anyone who hates me that much. At least, not that I know about. But I have had people who have hurt me terribly and very deeply, people I considered close friends. Needless to say, now they aren't my most favourite people. In fact, I've gone out of my way to avoid them. Oh, you know, I forgave them... through clenched teeth (ie. not really) but I'm certainly not going to invite them round for coffee.
Which is where Chan got me. He asked "Are you willing to do good to these people? To reach out to them?" (Pg 131)
Uh, that would be a NO.
I don't retaliate much. (Unless you're my husband or my kids. Then I will. Loudly; and more often than not, colourfully. I'm not proud of it; it's just a sad fact. God and me... we're workin' on it.) I'm a hider. An avoider. You hurt me and I'll pretty much stay out of your way. Oh, I'll snipe about you with my husband later, but I won't confront you. I’ll put on The Face when I can’t duck away before you notice me, and I’ll pretend nothing ever happened... but that’s not what Jesus is asking for here. What Jesus challenges us to do in these cases is to actively think and act nicely towards these people. To walk up to the person who caused you the most pain and bless them.
I heard once that you should pray for your enemies that which you wish for yourself. I think I can do that. It's a start at least. Coffee is still a little too hard at the moment, but I can pray that they are blessed in all areas of their lives, and that God's hand will be upon them. I can pray that the Lord fill me with His love for them... and one can only presume the rest will follow.
Obsessive Givers of Lives
As a worship leader, I can remember one Sunday urging the congregation to really mean the words they were singing... not just read them off the screen, but sing them intentionally. I was convicted right there that I myself can get so used to singing a song, what with rehearsals and practice and then typing them all up etc etc... that I too can just rattle them off without thinking about what I'm saying. So, right there on the platform, I promised God that I would always make the effort to mean the words I was singing to Him.
The first song I sang after that silent conversation was "Hosanna" by Brooke Fraser. (LOVE her)
"Break my heart for what breaks Yours
Everything I am for Your Kingdoms cause"
*pause*
Did you know that God takes you at your word?
And I can tell you, it changes your perspective. When you ask to receive God's heart, don't be surprised or put out when He gives it to you.
Since that day, my heart has been broken time and time again for the orphan, the unborn/aborted and the trafficked. I can only imagine how He is going to use this in my life. There have been a few windows of opportunity that we are excited to see emerging... but for the most part, we are just here waiting on God's timing, and just being willing and open to His call.
Are we willing to give God everything we are? Not just our will, our mind and our heart... but our body and our very lives? Not just in the way of "Ok, God... I'll do whatever You call me to do" but... are you willing to give your life life?
I'm pretty wrapped up in my kids and my husband. They sort of define me in a way at the moment. I'm certainly known in our church as the one with all the kids. Or Troy's mum. Or whichever child they happen to be talking about at that present time. Am I really willing to give them over to God to use to bring Him Glory?
When Francis was talking about being obsessed with safety, I immediately thought of this video. It cracks me up...
Of course, I know where it comes from (Job 1:10) which makes it even funnier, because it's Satan talking.
All joking aside, I've prayed that prayer. Many times. In many different situations. I think the reason I'm frightened to pray the suggested alternative is that I really kinda don't like pain. And I'm sort of attached to my kids and my husband. They grow on you after a while, y'know? And the first thing I can think of when being bold enough to pray that prayer is horrible things. The prayer that Francis challenges us to pray is right up there with prayers for patience and forgiveness...
*uncomfortable*
Obsessive Givers of Time
After reading this chapter, I said to myself "I’m not doing enough. I don’t' help out at a soup kitchen. I'm not on the cleaning roster at church. I'd rather shove peas up my nose than help out in the crèche or Kids Church. I'm obviously not Obsessed with Jesus, because I just do the worship and music and stuff."
Call me strange.
I am in no way saying that we should leave all the serving up to those dear single people or those whose children have grown. But while obsessed people are givers of their time, I doubt strongly that the Lord wants us to spread ourselves too thin... remember He often tells us to just be still. As always, take the time to listen to the Lord. But also remember... when He tells you to go... go.
Obsessive Givers of Resources
Do you give sacrificially?
Where I live, we are experiencing the worst housing crisis of any city in Australia, and perhaps the western world. People are living in tents because there is just nowhere else for them to go.
But at the same time... I don't know where these people are. I don't know what they need, besides a roof over their heads. I also couldn't tell you where to go to hand out food parcels. Like Francis, I have not intentionally gone to look for those in need.
When Francis told of the reactions of people when he sold his house, so that he could donate the extras to the poor, I chuckled to myself, because I had heard every single one of those... only they were talking about how many children we had.
Lots of people think we are crazy for having (almost) six kids. They are being nice about this pregnancy, more than they were the last one, where some people were downright hateful. Either that or they think we're nuts, and it's better not to disturb the unbalanced.
This really doesn't have much to do with being crazy in your literal interpretation of the bible, but it does example what people will think if you go against the "norm". Or when you don't do the "comfortable" Christianity so many seem to enjoy. Adam and I have a sponsor child in Guatemala, and even in the toughest times, like Jess spoke about on the video last week, it was never an option to not pay for his support. In our family, what we pay to Delmar each month costs the same as a dinner trip to MacDonald’s for all of us. In the greater scheme of things, it's not much. We hope to have at least as many sponsor children as we have biological ones... something that some people look at us strangely for, and question whether it’s a wise or fiscal decision. And whenever we mention that we would like (in about 5 or so years) to adopt a girl or two from a country where the sex slave trade is highest, people throw their hands up in horror and give us up as hopeless.
Putting yourself out there for others makes people uncomfortable. It's not your fault.
It's theirs.
Just run with it, and don't worry what people say. In the end, God isn't going to care about what other people thought at the time. He'll be more concerned with what He thought, and your reaction to that.
Jesus doesn't ask all of us to go off to serve in Africa, or start crisis pregnancy centres, or adopt eleventy-three orphans. For most of us it's just the everyday stuff that almost seems like it doesn't really matter... the child minding, the loving on our husbands and/or family, the prods to watch the way you speak to people or to adjust your attitude to house cleaning... Of course, those last two could just be mine, but you get the idea.
Be surrendered. Be willing. Take joy in serving others.
And Then There’s Our First Love
Not only do the obsessed love others, they love Jesus. Passionately. Since we can’t go up and hug Jesus personally just yet, our adoration plays out in doing what He asks of us. Jesus said in the first part of John 14:21 “Whoever has my commands and obeys them, he is the one who loves me.”
I vaguely remember Quiet Time. And yet, ridiculously, I wonder sometimes why my relationship with Jesus isn’t all it could or should be. A couple of weeks ago, during the sermon, the preacher said that he remembered a card on their mother’s dressing table mirror that said “Feeling far from God? Guess who moved.” You just can’t expect your relationship with your Heavenly Father to thrive and grow and deepen if you don’t actually deliberately draw aside to spend time with Him. Obsessed people spend as much time with Him as they can, are devoted to Him, and delight in bringing Glory to His name. They want to be like Christ... humble, forgiving, loving, giving, and in constant commune with the Father. They long for heaven, and remember, like Clara, that “You must be ready... It will be good for that servant whom the master finds doing so when he returns.” (Luke 12:40a & 43)
I remember when I was first dating Adam that all I wanted to do was be with him. If I could have crawled inside of his skin, I would have. There was nothing I wouldn't do for him, fetch for him, gift him... We spent hours on the phone, we wrote letters and notes to each other and we wagged (skipped) more classes than I think we attended because we just wanted to be together.
When was the last time you (I) felt like that about Jesus? That crazy, all consuming, obsessive love?
Or has your love not waned, exactly, but settled into a comfortable sort of... complacency?
That’s the bar I’m aiming for.
Thursday, October 29, 2009
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
*SNEEZE*
Stay tuned... there's something coming.
Now... where is that feather duster?