Thursday, May 27, 2010

Blank

Well, not really. Lots of thoughts and ideas, but no way of knowing if I'll be able to write them down coherently. I may have to write some drafts first.

I don't really want this to be another "mom blog". I want people to know me, the way I think, the way I feel, the way I over analyze, how I can pick one word out of a bible verse and wonder why they used that one, because it makes it so much deeper... I want to be authentic, I want this place to be somewhere people enjoy being, I want it to be fun and light-hearted, but with depth...

I want people to know God resides here.

And yet, I don't know exactly how. I read some amazing blogs. People who write beautifully. Some people are side splittingly funny. Some make me think. Others make me cry every time. Some people do all of the above.

Who am I in this online community?

I have the upside of being, essentially, a foreigner... in that most people who I read are American. I use words that make them scratch their heads, I sound funny and eat weird food combinations. So there's that, but is it enough?

Where do I fit? What does my voice sound like here? What's my niche? Would staying as random and flit about-y as I am naturally work in blogland, or do I need to have a cohesive and coherent platform?

(Anyone else have "free to be me" running in their head about now?)

And of course, now I'm second guessing myself, and whether I just sound like an attention junkie. Why am I even blogging?

Because I love the people here. Truly. And I want to be a part of the awesome things I know God has planned for everyone involved. If there is anything that excites me to the point of wanting to jump out of my skin, it's the thought of what we here in the blogland twitterverse have coming up in the next few years. What is our God up to?? It seems that all of a sudden, without my even trying, in the last few months, I have come across, and fallen into relationship with some of the most amazing, authentic, God honouring, exciting, anointed, world shaking history makers, and I feel something shifting, moving, and preparing.

I want to be a part of it.

But it feels just out of my reach, because I just don't know what my part in it is.

I don't want to miss out.

5 comments:

Erin said...

You are so fabulous...which is why you are one of my favorites. I feel the same way. God is up to amazing things and I look back at all that has happened in the last year and I know...I know...He with us. He has plans for us. You will see it. I will see it. The other girls will see. People that we don't even know yet will see it.

Cause that how our God does it.

Love you sister.

Erin

Anonymous said...

I'm sooo excited to read what is on your heart and mind. I look forward to your future here.

Gitz 'n Jo said...

My advice is probably against every blog-help book out there, but it's sincere.

Just write from your heart.

I honestly have no grand design for my blog. Which is probably why I don't have huge blog numbers. But I have people show up who are amazing, who I love and who love me back. That's what it's about.

I never knew I had something to say... I still don't know if I'll have something to blog about next week. But for me, writing the blog is the same as my conversations with my friends. Sometimes they are deep, sometimes they are ridiculous and sarcastic, but always they are real.

I'd take that over a following any day. I'm just thankful it brought me my friends, and I hope it brings people to a place of joy.

Jen said...

Gah! See, this is what I ws worried about... that it only sounds like I'm after followers. Seriously, I'm not, I couldn't care less... but like you Gitz, I just want to converse with my friends :) I'm just worried I'm boring or have nothing really to add to the conversation :)

Told you I suck at this :D It's been ages since I bogged properly, not since Xanga. I find it difficult to get my words out right, whether typed or spoken. It took me 5 days to write that chapter review for "Crazy Love", and I still don't think it was all it could have been.

Gitz 'n Jo said...

I didn't think you were after followers, I just think if you put too much pressure on yourself to find a voice, you'll be too frustratedntomuse the one you already have. I've no doubt half of what I write stinks compared to when I was a writer in a previous life. But they key is to just write anyway. The more you say, whether deep or silly, will help you find your rhythm.

Don't over think the words. Just write. And I'll come read. I promise.